granted, I've never met you so of course, have never danced with you. But I believe many important things come through in your writing. So with that said, I can't imagine *anyone* declining a dance with you.
Oh believe me, I have my share. And this is the important thing: I believe the power to invite must be balanced by the power to decline.
Friends (women) have told me that they do not invite men, because they want to know that men invite them BECAUSE they have listened to the music, thought about it, and then deliberately chosen the women to share that set.
Similarly, I WANT to know that a WOMAN accepts my invitation because she WANTS to dance with me. Otherwise, I would feel it, and it would not be a good experience.
"then deliberately chosen the women to share that set." -- I only recently felt the power of this - to share the particular music of that particular tanda with someone who knew that it was my favorite (and his as well). So I was chosen, and in turn chose him, with the music in mind. It was one of the best experiences I've had so far in my "young" tango life.
One girl used to do that to me too, along my first two years of learning. Now after five years I'm the one who does not want to dance with her. Yes we guys have a flat learning curve at the beginning, but time is on our side.
"then deliberately chosen the women to share that set." I like the way you put that - and it is often when I've consciously done this that I've had the most rewarding tandas.
Conversely, sometimes when I ask someone 'cos she's free NOW, and then the music starts I know I should have waited....
Now to ponder on that, and make that a more conscious part of my invites....
5 comments:
granted, I've never met you so of course, have never danced with you. But I believe many important things come through in your writing. So with that said, I can't imagine *anyone* declining a dance with you.
Mari,
Ha ha!!!
Oh believe me, I have my share. And this is the important thing: I believe the power to invite must be balanced by the power to decline.
Friends (women) have told me that they do not invite men, because they want to know that men invite them BECAUSE they have listened to the music, thought about it, and then deliberately chosen the women to share that set.
Similarly, I WANT to know that a WOMAN accepts my invitation because she WANTS to dance with me. Otherwise, I would feel it, and it would not be a good experience.
"then deliberately chosen the women to share that set." -- I only recently felt the power of this - to share the particular music of that particular tanda with someone who knew that it was my favorite (and his as well). So I was chosen, and in turn chose him, with the music in mind. It was one of the best experiences I've had so far in my "young" tango life.
One girl used to do that to me too, along my first two years of learning. Now after five years I'm the one who does not want to dance with her. Yes we guys have a flat learning curve at the beginning, but time is on our side.
"then deliberately chosen the women to share that set."
I like the way you put that - and it is often when I've consciously done this that I've had the most rewarding tandas.
Conversely, sometimes when I ask someone 'cos she's free NOW, and then the music starts I know I should have waited....
Now to ponder on that, and make that a more conscious part of my invites....
O
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