Dear Diary,
Last night, for the first time, well, not the first time, it was the first time that I had a vivid desire to know, to feel, how it would be, to be intimate with…
The movements in our embrace, so effortless, so quiet, so deliberate, so thoughtful…
Not only intimate, as in sex, but rather, intimate, as in exploring the body and the spirit within...
Showing posts with label moment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label moment. Show all posts
soul embrace
dear diary,
it was a normal night. i did not have any expectations other than being with friends, being in the embrace, and being in the music. yes i know that's asking a lot! but the truth is that i am blessed to have friends who make this possible, all. the. time...
in the middle of a set, i was no longer in the embrace of G$oia. no it was odd, a rare i-don't-know-how-to-call-it and i was taken aback.
i mentioned this to G$oia, that it was special, to which she asked, "in what way?" i struggled... and then, "everything was so good... and suddenly i felt that i was embracing a human soul." it was crazy i told her.
and then she revealed to me that she had just had a fight and was shaken.
i had embraced her soul.
it was a normal night. i did not have any expectations other than being with friends, being in the embrace, and being in the music. yes i know that's asking a lot! but the truth is that i am blessed to have friends who make this possible, all. the. time...
in the middle of a set, i was no longer in the embrace of G$oia. no it was odd, a rare i-don't-know-how-to-call-it and i was taken aback.
i mentioned this to G$oia, that it was special, to which she asked, "in what way?" i struggled... and then, "everything was so good... and suddenly i felt that i was embracing a human soul." it was crazy i told her.
and then she revealed to me that she had just had a fight and was shaken.
i had embraced her soul.
clueless
(between songs)
me: "i love this place."
tanguera: "..."
me: "yup. everyone is so flirty..."
tanguera: "i am flirting with you right now."
me: "i love this place."
tanguera: "..."
me: "yup. everyone is so flirty..."
tanguera: "i am flirting with you right now."
trance
i dj.
i see the crowd becoming one. it's just the music now. the chatter has gone away. the eyes now half open. the flow is calm.
holy shit i think to myself. i have got to hold this trance. don't mess up. keep them in the flow.
a very very good night.
now that's feedback
dear diary,
i have not danced with her before. i watched for a bit, and then, when she became available, i asked her to dance. after the first song, the usual "uncomfortable-because-i-don't-know-what-to-say" chitchat. after the second song, i detected in her a twinge of lingering. then as the third song of the set ends, she held our embrace, dropping any pretenses.
talk about a boost to my confidence.
awesome.
i have not danced with her before. i watched for a bit, and then, when she became available, i asked her to dance. after the first song, the usual "uncomfortable-because-i-don't-know-what-to-say" chitchat. after the second song, i detected in her a twinge of lingering. then as the third song of the set ends, she held our embrace, dropping any pretenses.
talk about a boost to my confidence.
awesome.
sidelined
dear diary,
almost two months ago, i started to study Brazilian Jiu Jitsu (BJJ). At first, I was quite concerned that my sparring partners would injure me. My elbow having been snapped a long time ago, it would be extremely sensitive to BJJ's trademark dislocation techniques.
i was also quite out-of-shape. frankly, i did not think that i would last long before becoming sidelined with an injury, and before i could regain some physical condition. at my first workout, i could only spar for 5 minutes before total exhaustion. but, last week, i finally began to trust. and, not only did i last for the entire 90 minute workout, i sparred for 15 minutes. of course, i almost fainted after that. but, it was fantastic fantastic.
on a roll, until i became quite weak, debilitated, on friday. i am getting better, but i can only do things (anything: walk, talk, eat) for a few minutes at a time, and then i would have to rest. i haven't been to work, because i have no energy at all. i read on the internet that it may be six weeks before i recover fully. great. just what my fragile mind that is always full of anxieties and panics needs...
shit.
almost two months ago, i started to study Brazilian Jiu Jitsu (BJJ). At first, I was quite concerned that my sparring partners would injure me. My elbow having been snapped a long time ago, it would be extremely sensitive to BJJ's trademark dislocation techniques.
i was also quite out-of-shape. frankly, i did not think that i would last long before becoming sidelined with an injury, and before i could regain some physical condition. at my first workout, i could only spar for 5 minutes before total exhaustion. but, last week, i finally began to trust. and, not only did i last for the entire 90 minute workout, i sparred for 15 minutes. of course, i almost fainted after that. but, it was fantastic fantastic.
on a roll, until i became quite weak, debilitated, on friday. i am getting better, but i can only do things (anything: walk, talk, eat) for a few minutes at a time, and then i would have to rest. i haven't been to work, because i have no energy at all. i read on the internet that it may be six weeks before i recover fully. great. just what my fragile mind that is always full of anxieties and panics needs...
shit.
license
partner: "they should require licenses!"
me: "ha ha ha!!! yes! like a driver's test, people need to pass a test to earn their tango license."
me: "ha ha ha!!! yes! like a driver's test, people need to pass a test to earn their tango license."
drool
in the middle of a great set, in close embrace...
oh oh... i release my left arm to quietly (of course she is unaware of this most embarrassing faux pas)...
"just wiping off my drool."
she bursts into laughter.
oh oh... i release my left arm to quietly (of course she is unaware of this most embarrassing faux pas)...
"just wiping off my drool."
she bursts into laughter.
oops
i am dancing with a favorite partner, to a great set, when,
a mental hiccup.
me: "so sorry."
she: (giggle)
me: "... sorry (again). you see, i am dancing with you and the woman next to us at the same time, and just a moment ago, that was a move for her."
she: (gigGLE)
me: "ok. hold on, this one is for you."
she: (bursting)
-
she could not stop laughing for the rest of the song.
a mental hiccup.
me: "so sorry."
she: (giggle)
me: "... sorry (again). you see, i am dancing with you and the woman next to us at the same time, and just a moment ago, that was a move for her."
she: (gigGLE)
me: "ok. hold on, this one is for you."
she: (bursting)
-
she could not stop laughing for the rest of the song.
the one
i have never seen her before. all i know is that a line of men are waiting to dance with her. every time i get ready to approach her, another man invites her to the floor. ugh! finally, i seize a moment. i am mere inches away from her. i ask, "would you..." oh no she has just agreed to dance with another man. he turns to look at me, "sorry." (yeah right you are sorry. bull shit you are sorry.)
i return to my chair. my friend asks, "well?" i said, "nope. someone else beat me to it."
a few minutes later, i say to my friend, "hey you know what would be wild????" "what?" he asks. "i bet you she is going to come to ask me to dance." my friend looks at me, feeling sorry for me.
at the end of the set, she and her partner walk toward us (i turn to look at my friend, with a twinkle in my eye), and we dance the last set of the night.
i return to my chair. my friend asks, "well?" i said, "nope. someone else beat me to it."
a few minutes later, i say to my friend, "hey you know what would be wild????" "what?" he asks. "i bet you she is going to come to ask me to dance." my friend looks at me, feeling sorry for me.
at the end of the set, she and her partner walk toward us (i turn to look at my friend, with a twinkle in my eye), and we dance the last set of the night.
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