mismatch

dear diary,

by now i am confident to request a dance, and have thick enough skin when they decline. but, what i didn't expect to befuddle me, since it had been a long time that this happened, was the complete mismatch in the connection, the embrace.

the first song started innocuously enough. i struggled with her preferred inertia; i adjusted a number of times, trying to understand her. we smiled politely during the brief interval between the 1st and 2nd song, exchanged our names, and then into the embrace, i tried again, to connect with her.

the floor was the most crowded ever, because it was a special night, with special guests. but i have been, for some time, quite comfortable, indeed, i welcomed the small space, and the necessary small dances.

and now i realized that i could not understand her, that i could not hear her, if she was speaking to me, or worse, that she was not speaking to me.

and now the tightening of her body, and i knew it was over.